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Didem Gurdur

You would not believe that the person who writes this is me if you see me just right now. I just checked the mirror and I do not look like myself at all. If I don’t it is certain that you would not recognize me either. I have 8 stitches just above my eyebrows and I do not know exactly where they are even though this is the fourth day after the event.

I came home after a wonderful NordDesign 2018 conference in Linkoping on Friday afternoon. Wanted to open some windows, cook some food and spend the night by cuddling with my wife and cats. I couldn’t even finish the cooking part. There was a door frame leaning on one of the windows for our new balcony construction. The wind moved it towards me and instead of doing nothing and letting the heavy wood frame to fall down, I had the idea to go and catch it! Yeah, it was not so smart.

I am home resting and actually, I am not allowed to spend so much time on a computer which is a big test and as you can see I am failing. It is boring to be home and not doing anything so I think I can write this post quite quickly and we act like it never happen. The reason I am writing this is actually not about the accident but our brain. I am shocked about how sensitive our head is, really. One hit and tons of different things start to happen one after another one. Memory loss, blurry eyes, swollen face but most incredible one is this tingling feeling on my head. Apparently, when we have this kind of experiences and shake our brain some neurons can get damaged. During the last two days they are trying to find new paths to work properly. Isn’t this fascinating? New neuron paths in my brain. I am sure they have fancier words to describe it, yesterday I tried to read something and it was a more academic elegant word like regeration or something but I forgot it and I promised that I will not work or try to concentrate on things to push my brain further so you have to leave with this mystery now.

It will be so cliche but, man, I was so close to a thousand different possible ways to make my whole life to change forever. Be safe and when things start to fall do not try to be a hero to save things, just first save yourself. Only when things go wrong we understand what a miracle it is that we are alive and healthy, otherwise we take it for granted. Be nice to yourself today, there are people all around us who are in pain, are scared, hurt without even knowing what is wrong with them. I am happy that it ended up this way and even though I do not have the best face ever, I am recovering.

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